Their Not Mosquito Bites !!!!

Okay so today I went to my GP, and after being on antibiotics since Monday (prescribed to me by the emergency department at my local hospital) my fingers are now even worse!!!! She told me that unfortunately their not mosquito bites, but a lot more serious.... Apparently I have been bitten by a bug (although the medical profession don't know what sort of bug it is) I have been diagnosed with "Gippsland Ulcers"????? So today I've had one "VERY LARGE" and "PAINFUL" injection in my bottom (injections don't worry me....but that's another story) of a very powerful antibiotic, to hopefully help heal up my fingers, and tomorrow morning I have too go back and see my GP for another one!!!! She said that "Gippsland Ulcers" don't usually respond too antibiotics, and its more likely that next week I'll have to go and see a surgeon to have them cut out....... "OUCH"
There are two of them at the moment, and I noticed this morning that another one is coming up on my ring finger on my left hand!!!!!! If the surgeon has too cut them out, there wont be much of my two fingers left..... I am so terrified, and they are so "PAINFUL". I didn't realise how much I bump my hands, until I got these on my fingers, the pain can only be described as someone twisting my fingers with a knife, and when I bump them, it feels like someone is hitting them with a hammer at the same time..... Arrggggghhh....
I have not been allowed too put my hands in or near water for two weeks!!!!
Also I've been told I'm not too put my hands in or near water until they are gone!!! (Not even with gloves on)....Whenever that will be????
So now I have some questions:
1. How do I have a shower without getting my hands wet?
2. How do I get my two children ages 13 and 11,to do the dishes? (because the dirty dishes have been piling up for a week now)!!!!
3. Please excuse the next question, but:
4. How do I wash my hands after going to the toilet? (sorry)
5. How do I do wash my hair?
6. How do I get dressed?
7. How do I put my socks on?
8. How (if I'm lucky to be able to get dressed) do I get things in or out of my pockets?
9. How do I get anything out of my handbag?
10. How do I get money out of my purse?
11. How do I put LPG (gas) in my car?
12. How do I lock and unlock my house with the keys?
13. How do I use my mobile phone?
14. How do I cook?
15. How do I open anything up? (eg: milk containers, jars, tins, etc)
16. How do I change a toilet roll?
17. How do I light a cigarette, let alone trying to hold it so I can smoke it?
18. How do I open a bottle of wine to be able to have a glass to drown my sorrows.
19. How do I put on my makeup?
20. How do I do my housework?
21. How do I make the beds?
22. How do I do my hair?
Believe me the list of questions would be too long to put them all here.
If anyone knows the answer too my questions or can explain what "Gippsland Ulcers" really are, I would really appreciate It please.....please.....please.....
I have one on the middle finger on my right hand, and the other is on the index finger on my left hand. Which of course makes it impossible too do anything!! I didn't realise how much I use these fingers, until now.
Would you believe me if I said I am actually writing this with my thumbs?
Well I am.... and its not easy.... Just try and picture it....
And now my two children have gone to their fathers for the weekend.
If I wasn't laughing so much on how silly my situation is, I think I'd be crying.
Thank goodness I have great family, friends and neighbours.
I suppose all I can do at the moment is laugh, and my silly sense of humour really helps !!!!!!
I've gotta go, my thumbs are getting tired, and my bottom is sore...lol....
Kay xxxx